Am I Enabling Addiction by Helping My Child? Partnership to End Addiction

It’s important for people to receive the proper treatment for these conditions. If they’re open to the idea, help them find a good therapist or counselor who specializes in addiction and mental health issues. Even when addiction issues are on the table, parenting experts use the term “over-parenting” to describe enabling. They refer to inappropriate strategies and tactics or unhealthy behaviors that deliver positive short-term outcomes but lead to lasting emotional issues and insufficient and unhealthy long-term solutions. Thus, providing a loved one with a place to live after they complete a treatment program or watching their kids while they attend AA or NA meetings, for example, help them.

Professional guidance

Master Addictions Counselor Mary Ann answers some of parents’ most commonly asked questions about https://appsychology.com/living-in-a-sober-house/ their child’s drug use. It can be very challenging to recognize these and other behaviors as enabling. Geno, an adult client of mine, not his real name came in to see me, feeling very frustrated and angry. He described recently seeing his adult son’s phone number (Geno is paying for the phone line) pop up on his caller ID. But, he thought, after all, «This is my son, and I love him,» so he accepted the call.

enabling a drug addict child

Getting started with addiction treatment may feel intimidating at first. We understand this and are ready to help you on your road to recovery. We can offer guidance and insight into the recovery process, and will work to provide you with clarity into the steps that lay ahead. Helping a loved one with active drug addiction is a battle that can go on for a prolonged period. Your child’s addiction can significantly impact your life and relationships. Our navigators can also help you verify your insurance or discuss other payment options so that you can feel confident taking the first steps on the road to recovery.

Not all consequences are tolerated equally

Sahil has utilized his experience by treating patients in both civilian and military settings. He is a Captain in the Army Reserves and has 15 years of military service. Detaching from your loved one may be one of the toughest things you’ll ever do, but it is a necessary step. Addiction is a disease that should be addressed with sympathy, so avoid accusatory language or a confrontational attitude.

Encourage the person struggling with alcohol or drug use to get help. One of the less-considered types of enabling comes in making your child feel bad about himself and his problems. We often think of enabling behaviors as spoiling a child or shielding him from harm, but the opposite can also maintain the addiction. Protecting your son’s image Living in a Sober House: Fundamental Rules is an aspect of covering his responsibilities.

Advice for Parents of Addicts

Taking care of your mental health can help you support your addicted loved one. Learning new strategies can stop parents’ enabling behaviors and create a healthier family dynamic that supports recovery. The journey will not be easy, but the end result will be worth the effort. American Addiction Centers (AAC) is a leading treatment provider and has trusted rehab programs across the country. You can find an AAC drug and alcohol rehab center online now or instantly verify your insurance coverage based on your specific health insurance provider. You can also call AAC free at at any time for helpful advice, information, or admissions.

Helping Your Adult Child Without Enabling

Your best course of action is to do nothing – don’t call them in “sick” or bail them out of jail. These are examples of doing something “nice” for your loved one that may increase the likelihood that they continue using substances. From a behavioral standpoint, “nice” things are reinforcing, meaning that they increase the likelihood that the behavior will be repeated.

Sustained Recovery

  • Anytime a loved one is struggling with drug addiction it can take a tremendous toll on you.
  • Noticing positive actions and acknowledging them is helpful, not enabling.
  • Helping someone get over a drug problem looks very different than enabling.
  • If your son’s addiction is creating an unsafe or volatile atmosphere for yourself, other family members, or even your son, it may be necessary to prioritize safety and seek alternative solutions.

But as they get older, the support and attention they really need become a more challenging-to-decipher gray area. It’s challenging to decipher, and it’s challenging to act on—a healthy balance of stepping forward in support and stepping back to let them live their own life firsthand. The difficulty can be even more acute when your adult child struggles with addiction. When looking for a substance abuse professional, it can be a good idea to consult a trusted healthcare professional or counselor you have already been working with.

enabling a drug addict child

Practical Advice for Parents Dealing with a Drug Addicted Child

  • Not financially contributing to their own upkeep frees up the time and funds for them to spend on drugs and alcohol.
  • Until he or she is abstinent, this way of thinking will not change.
  • The information contained on this website is not intended to be a substitute for, or to be relied upon as, medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
  • Contact our intake specialists now to learn about our holistic treatment and support programs or to schedule an intake evaluation.
  • Seeing your child suffer can also cause you a tremendous amount of anguish and emotional pain.
  • BetterHelp can connect you to an addiction and mental health counselor.

Be compassionate and avoid stigmatizing language, blaming them, or being judgmental. These may not be easy practices to implement, but parents who save their children have taken these type of actions. Focusing more on being in the role of a friend than a parent can have potentially negative consequences. Good parenting involves setting limits and being aware of when the rules at home aren’t effective. When teens are shielded from embarrassment, excused from school or work by a parent and rescued from legal or social problems, they are enabled to continue to abuse substances.

Learn about their prevalence, impacts, and the need for integrated treatment. If you or a loved one are struggling, reach out to Findlay Recovery Center today for personalized support. Discover the challenges of co-occurring disorders, specifically schizophrenia and substance use. This post highlights integrated treatment approaches and support strategies essential for recovery and improved mental health.

Our team is comprised of doctors, clinicians, therapists, mentors, and recovery coaches with decades of experience in the field. Carolina Center for Recovery is lucky to have some of the most qualified and experienced addiction specialists in the country. Watching your child struggle with addiction can cause a flood of feelings. You may worry, feel angry, or experience guilt and shame about their substance abuse.

Take actions to support your well-being, such as attending therapy, support groups, or 12-step programs. Addiction is a family disease, so you should consider attending family therapy programs. An addict’s family often has to deal with the consequences of their addiction, causing an unhappy environment. Meeting with a licensed counselor can help families find a way forward.

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